Saturday, November 19, 2011

Master Gardener Humor

Top 10 Ways that your neighbors know that you are a Master Gardener:

10. You have the Horticultural Hotline number on your speed-dial.
9. When attending your children's soccer game, you check for crabgrass.
8. You'd turn down a job transfer to a city with a shorter growing season.
7. You know the precise botanical name of every plant in your yard, but have difficulty remembering the names of your spouse and children.
6. You buy beer for slugs.
5. Your children's hair has been clipped into topiary forms.
4. At parties, you've been overheard discussing the pros and cons of sterilizing garden soil in your oven.
3. You enjoy receiving a load of well-rotted manure for a special occasion.
2. Your bumper sticker reads: "I brake for worms," "I'd rather be weeding," or "Have you hugged your cactus today?"
1. You're disappointed to learn that you can't order vegetable seeds from L. L. Bean.

Number 3 is especially funny, because I was over the moon when a friend of mine gave me a 5-gallon bucket of worm casings. My husband however couldn't be less interested when I called him at work to share my good news.

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